The Battle Within

Divinity is found

Within you and I

But also ego

All humans have this battle within

Dark & light

Devil & angel

Ego & divine

Grow the divine fertile seeds with love & compassion

Acknowledge the ego

Bow to it

Feed it carefully

Feed it with understanding

Care for the darker side

For in caring for the dark we grow the light

Darkness, Transformation, and Redemption.

The darkest moments of my life led to the most transformation. The darkness brings self-reflection, awareness, and focus.  This is only if we do not numb the pain with alcohol, drugs, and/or overeating. When a family member suddenly dies or a relationship ends, we can have moments of pure awareness and clarity on what led to this moment in time.

My first experience with this transformation was when I was honest with my ex-fiance about my infidelity. She left me the following day. At first, I numbed myself with distraction but when her parents moved all her stuff out of our studio I was forced to sit in a dark & empty apartment. My first reaction was to run away and move to a new place. Luckily I chose to stay in my empty studio. The following weeks I cried every night in sorrow. Pain, suffering, and anxiety filled each moment until one day I picked up a book called “Buddhist Bootcamp” by Timber Hawkeye. Suddenly I was meditated 1 hour a day, reading, writing, eating healthier, and working out every day. I quit smoking and significantly cut down on drinking alcohol. My days were now filled with joy instead of sorrow. This all took place from March-May 2015 in San Luis Obispo, CA. Since then I have fallen back into old habits, relearn lessons, and also had new transformations from suffering. I began a journey of self-love, peace, forgiveness, and acceptance; a journey I am currently still on (and always will be). There is no destination on this path, only the love of the journey itself.

The famous Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh says “No Mud, No Lotus”. The beautiful lotus flower grows in the darkest and muddiest environments; I truly believe humans are much the same as the beautiful lotus flower. The right environment for growth usual consists of awareness, compassion, and love while we are suffering. Once we learn how to suffer, we suffer much less. Suffering can actually be the most transformative process of life if we allow it to be.

Through the darkness, we can transform ourselves and become the light to see out of the darkness. We accept the darker side of ourselves (and the world) with compassion, understanding, and peace. In this practice, we feed the light while accepting the dark. This allows for peace instead of war. The key to transformation is to sit with ourselves through the pain instead of distraction or numbing the pain. The coldest winters of my life have always ended with a warm inviting spring. All is impermanent, even the darkest of times.

 

With Aloha,

Johnny Hoffman

All Will Be Okay.

When we are lost

When we hit the lowest of lows

There is always light

Light within us

Surrounding us at every moment

 

Let the wind dry your tears

For every storm will pass

The sun will rise once more

Bringing light into the darkness

The Darkness Within.

Inside me

There is darkness

Greed, fear & even hatred

Inside me

There is light

Compassion, forgiveness & love.

I acknowledge both

For there can not be light without the dark

I vow to acknowledge the greed, fear, anger, and hatred with me

But to feed the seeds of love, compassion, and faith

To love both of them unconditionally

To acknowledge the light & darkness within myself and all

Through the Darkness, We Shall Rise.

Through the darkness, we shall rise

Rise like the sun

Bringing light into the darkness

For we are all holy men & women

Lost in the sea of fear

We have forgotten our true nature

Of compassion & love

We are disoriented by distraction

Haunted by our past

Paralyzed by the path unknown ahead of us

We cling to material wealth & status

Fearful to take risks for the true life we desire

So how do we begin this journey?

Don’t worry

The answer lies within you

Good luck

 

 

Darkness.

The darkness surrounds me.

Fear consuming every thought.

Anger pulsating through every cell.

Hatred burning into my soul.

Greed filling up my mind.

 

Do I resist the darkness?

Do I suppress these dark emotions?

 

No.

I will accept the darkness.

I will honor the greed, anger, hatred, and fear inside me as part of who I am.

But I vow to shine light into the darkness of my soul.

 

The light of love.

The light of kindness.

The light of compassion.

The light of forgiveness.

 

I will show the darkness another way.

 

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